Family Issues Counselling
You are not just parents; you are stewards of the next generation.
Would you like to learn an approach to parenting that provides one consistent foundation to raise happy, confident, children who; make good independent decisions even when you are not around?
Raise children who grow into teens who are capable, resilient and creative?
Would you like to have a more harmonious home where yelling, nagging, and punishing is replaced by calm communication and mutual respect?
I will teach you tried and true techniques of practical parenting that work, even in the most difficult situations.
More: Family is our most precious institution. It is the foundation of our values, our goals and our attitudes about caring for others in our society. It all begins here. It is the first place we learn about belonging, love, and personal significance, which are the food, water and shelter of our emotional world. Believe it or not the pursuit of finding acceptance, feeling loved, and what it takes to feel important and valued; is a reflection of who you are today. As we work together we will uncover the barriers to ‘harmony in your home’ and then it can exist in your life. You will find that your own psychological profile may be getting in the way of good parenting as well as good relationships of all kinds. Once you are aware of your own self-protections, together we can challenge the need to keep them and find new ways for you to feel emotionally safe.
Relationship Counselling
A happy life long relationship will be the most difficult and important task you will ever do. It will influence you and your children in every way you can imagine.
If you would like to know the secret to making a successful relationship? Call me.
For the last eight years I have been researching the communication styles of Men and Women through the books and articles of Deborah Tannen, John Gray, Kevin Leman, Louann Brizendine MD and others. As shocking as it may be (haha) men and women communicate so differently that very often they have no idea why the other just said what they did. It is by far the most interesting and helpful research I have ever done both for myself (3 sons a brother and a husband!!) And my clients.
I have evidence that even after a lot of damage has been done, repair is possible. (John Gottman -The Relationship Cure) It’s entirely to do with something called the Compassionate Response (Matthew McKay)
How interested are you in the thoughts and feelings of your partner?
How will they know it?
How will you show it?
How accountable will each of you be for your role in the breakdown of the loving behavior?
Like I said it is a difficult task but with structure and skills and guidance you
can make a relationship to last you a lifetime.
Anxiety and Depression Counselling
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy - which in simple terms is - changing the thinking - will change the feeling -will change the action that follows the feeling.
“The destiny of every human being is decided by what goes on inside his skull when confronted with what goes on outside his skull” Dr. Eric Berne
Anxiety is the effort of the body and mind to protect us from perceived threatening situations. The interpretation of what is a threat is determined by our personal experience and the resulting psychological fears. Of course these are unique to each person. You see, the emotional brain will sabotage rational/logical thinking due to the fight or flight response. If rational thinking is unable to be accessed we eventually get stuck in a cycle of overprotection and overwhelming negative thoughts. This creates dysfunction in our lives that leads to feelings of helplessness, hopelessness and avoidance. Thus, opening the door to Depression. When these symptoms are present, professional support is needed because the brain chemistry associated with Depression works against the motivation required to do what is needed to counteract it. Where Depression is concerned, it is best to first consult with your doctor. With help, you can learn to manage both Anxiety and Depression through an eight step structured counselling process working with both your physical and mental responses.
Stress and Conflict
Stress is an imbalance between the demands of life and your coping abilities at any particular time. The medical community has identified Stress as the mischief maker in many diseases, disorders and the general health of our community. Stress causes harmful chemicals to be released into our body. Sometimes it becomes a lifestyle and until something goes wrong in our life we don’t even notice it. Conflict is often one of the unavoidable side effects of Stress. Learn how to find balance in your life between good stress, relaxation, pleasure, and the inevitable bad stress.
Conflict is one of the outcomes of unfulfilled expectations. We think we can expect someone or something to respond a certain way and when it doesn’t happen we become disappointed, frustrated, or angry. If conflict is taking over your life I can teach you skills and language to empower you toward meaningful communication and resolution.
How you deliver your message is the key to diffusing conflict. There are simple rules to follow that can improve your interactions with almost everyone.